Wednesday, February 01, 2006

Calm. Clear. Mind.

Calm. Clear. Mind. At least that's what the posters at work (not mine, Mrs. Peep's) are advertising. Mental wellness. I need some of that. I wonder if they would let me attend...the sign says everyone welcome...

If you can't tell, I'm a little stressed.

I know, you are wondering what a cat has to be stressed out about. Normally I would agree with you. Especially me. I do have quite the good life. I am beautiful and I am worshipped. I don't have to work for a living. And my Peeps have an extensive DVD collection and the Movie Network. Plus two balconies -- double the birding and sunbeam opportunities. But I digress. I HAD a wonderful life...before...Lickfest 2006. Honestly, I swear my tongue has acquired callouses. My jaws are getting rusty, I can't keep anything down, I'm dizzy from all the frantic activity, and I haven't slept more than two winks in two weeks. And if I don't sleep Mrs. Peep doesn't either, and that's Not A Good Thing.

I just can't take much more. I have to, ahem, lick this, ahem, afflicktion. Or I will go berserk. And trust me, it is a short trip. I could blow at any minute. I have a busy month ahead, things to blog, blogs to thing, and some serious entertaining to do (both Grandma Peeps are coming to visit, one after the other...Yay!) I need my good health and good mental health. But I am in good hands. Mr. Peep is coming to the rescue - he's going to take me to see my good friend Dr. Lehrman tomorrow.

Dr. L. also worships me. Because he thinks I am the prettiest cat he has ever seen (stop laughing! he has seen other cats!), I will forgive him the occasional lapse with the thermometer in rude places. Not too mention very traumatic surgery - twice! And the fact that my heart stopped the last time. Literally. But never mind, I have eight lives more or less left. He has a very soothing voice, and he likes to talk. About me. My favourite topic! So although going to see Dr. L. will increase my stress and be quite traumatic, here's hoping that he can fix me for once and for all! Plan B is not an option and there is no Plan C. (Plan B's not an option because, well, it doesn't exist - you know how I am with plans...) Argh! I am getting stressed just thinking about everything again.

Breathe. Breathe.

Calm. Clear. Mind. No. Licking.


Kelly said...

Maybe some lickour (liquour) would help?

koko puff said...