Once upon a time there was a woman who was very thirsty. She had a friend. And a camera. The planets aligned. Sufficiently recovered from her close encounter with death earlier in the week, the woman ventured forth with said friend and camera to the Gourmet Food & Wine Expo to test the limits of her physical endurance once again.
15:28 The woman faces her test bravely; it is a mixed bag after all: Henry of Pelham Cuvee Catherine Brut Rose, VQA; Yellow by Yellowglen Australian Sparkling Wine; Anchor Brewing Company, Liberty Ale, San Francisco; Mt. Difficulty Pinot Noir, 2004 Central Otago New Zealand; Henry of Pelham Baco Noir VQA, 2005; Singleton Single Malt Scotch Whisky of Dufftown; Navan Vanilla Liqueur; Voyant Chai Cream Liqueur. The woman feels confident. She has plenty of training. She has spent the previous hour warming up. She has her trusty friend and camera. But most importantly, she has an entertaining and educational guide: The Thirsty Traveler.
17:22 Mission accomplished, no problem! The thirsty woman is thirsty no more. The woman is happy. Her tastebuds are happy. Her tummy and head perhaps not so much, but never mind about that.
17:27 The woman glances around the room and realizes she drank but the tip of the iceberg. Metaphorically and literally, in fact. Not only was she personally responsible for a comparatively quite small portion of the empties, but she did drink the actual Canadian Iceberg Vodka when it was passed around in order to cleanse her palate.
17:52 The woman and her friend mob The Thirsty Traveler. He's a good sport. Like the woman and her friend, he's no longer thirsty at the moment. Also, much like the person taking the picture with the requisite blurry cam shot - a very typical ending of an episode of The Thirsty Traveler. They like him. They like him a lot. They don't swipe his pewter mug.
Instead the woman and her friend go home to (tylenol, imodium and) happily ever after.
The end. Until the next time.